‘Karma’. What are the first few thoughts that come to mind when you think of this word? Often times, people think of karma as God’s or the Universe’s way of punishing us and this couldn’t be further from the truth. But, its quite understandable why we would even see karma in this way.
The Law of Karma works like this…you must have done it to another for it to be done to you. The Universe balances all things out & see nothing that we do as good or bad because there is no judgement in love. Only understanding that we have made a mistake and that we can learn from it. So in reality, the hurtful way someone may have spoken to us… we had to have done it to someone else first. That boyfriend or girlfriend who cheated on us… we had to have done it first (either in this life or a past one). Karma works by balancing at the first available opportunity. So if it could not be balanced in a previous life, it would do so in the current one if the opportunity arose. And don’t be worried. It balances out exactly. No more and no less. If it was done once to another, karma will balance it by allowing it to happen to you only once.
Now, I know that many people will not and do believe in past lives or reincarnation, so all of what I say will not ring true for you, and that is okay. Each person’s path in this lifetime is different and so each of us will have different beliefs. The important part of this karmic message is the lesson that through experiencing what we have caused others to experience, we learn important life lessons that allow us to move closer to love.
I will give you a very personal example to show exactly how karma can help us move more towards love.
A few year back I had a boyfriend and in this relationship with this person, I found myself unhappy and not treated well. It would have been in my best interest to leave the relationship, but instead I complained to another and, long story short, I ended up cheating. It happened only once but I felt so bad about it afterwards that I broke up with my boyfriend the next day and asked to just be friends.
So, fast forward a year later. I had started at a new job and it was only meant to be seasonal, so I decided to keep my head low, do my job, and get out of there once the busy season was done. The Universe seemed to want to have it another way. To my surprise, many of my co-workers were very friendly and wanted to make conversation. One person is particular made it known that he liked me and made it his mission to pursue a relationship.
I continuously told him no because it was work and that seemed unprofessional, but really that was just an excuse. We worked in a large factory moving boxes and half the managers cursed and yelled at the employees all day. There really wasn’t much professionalism here to stop me from pursuing someone, but still I insisted. After a while, I came to like his personality though. He seemed nice enough, had manners, and made me laugh…ALOT. So, I gave in and said why not. We started dating and it was fine. Actually, I was head over heels.
It was only a few weeks in and completely uncharacteristic of me, I had decided to let him meet my mom. I’d never let my significant others meet my family and some of them I had dated for months. I even had friends that I never invited over because I cared too much about who I introduced to and let influence my younger siblings. But this guy seemed nice enough. For some reason I felt so impacted by this person that I wanted to introduce him to my family. The day it was supposed to happen, he couldn’t make it. He had his son that day and things had run long, so he apologized.
After that day though, he acted weird over the phone and in person he kept saying how he didn’t deserve me and how much he loved me. I thought he was being his same goofy and dramatic self. But I was wrong. Later that day, he told me that he had sex with his ex (the mother of his child), and that it had happened only once. I forgave him, because in the back of my mind I knew that I had once done the same thing to someone else, but it didn’t make it hurt any less. For reasons apart from him cheating, the relationship didn’t last but I believe that this experience was an important life lesson and a karmic debt that was paid.
From experiencing the hurt caused by finding out someone has cheated on you, I promised to never do it again. I promised to never hurt someone in the same way and through this I have become a more loving person. I made a mistake in the past, learned a lesson through experiencing it for myself, and can now live my life with this new perspective and knowing.
For the longest I was unaware of this law and it got in the way of breaking down my ego and caused me to feel like a victim when I felt hurt by others. The reality of it is this… we can take full ownership of the way people treat us if we simple see them as karmic debts being paid or lessons we’ve chose to learn in this lifetime. It may not be easy to do, but it is worthwhile. At least for myself, it took away a lot of the hurt and allowed me to forgive not only a lot of people in my life, but myself as well!
While this message is simply, its application can be quite difficult. For myself, it would have been easier to place the blame on another for being cheated on. Instead, I chose to take back my power, not feel like a victim, and realize that I was the reason I got cheated on.
And who doesn’t want to get back their power?! But this is all to say that we can regain control of the way we see our lives. Instead of feeling like victims or believing we have no control, we can rest in knowing that as we treat people with respect and love, we will begin to experience more of that in our lives. Yes, our karma will still have to be balanced and we will have those things to deal with, but with awareness of this, those unfortunate situations can become lessons instead of personal attacks on our lives by others. We start to see our role in how our lives have turned out and begin to turn the tides in a positive way for ourselves. So rest assured that your life is fully in your control. It’s never too late to start being kind and loving… and know that any challenge or difficultly can become a lesson if we simply shift our perspective.
And once we see and experience the hurt that we have caused others, hopefully it will help us to re-examine if this is the way we really want to continue treating people. What we did in the past were only mistakes. We did the best we could in that very moment with the knowledge that we had. With this new knowing and perspective, we can choose to act in a more loving manner and treat others the way we want to be treated…because while karma balances out the mistakes we make, it also balances out the good we do. For every loving thing we do to another will be returned to us as well. So live a loving life, aware of the effects of your choices, and I promise you wont be disappointed!